You guys, I will never denigrate the Creepiest Bodega In Chicago ever again.
Don’t get me wrong. The bodega across the street and up the block from my building is still the creepiest. It is actually slightly less creepy now that they stopped also being a pizza parlor, but it’s very creepy. And yet.
There, hanging on a rack, in front of the “probably everything you need to make meth” shelf in the back of the store, were bags and bags of chocolate covered almonds.
You’re nonconformists bucking the Superfood-crazed mainstream, Creepy Bodega, and I salute you. And pay in cash and leave quickly.
Ohhhhhhh no you guys these almonds
They are old
They are very old
This bag expired in 2004
Published
Mooncustafer 