I saw you said avocado should be a condiment so NOW I HAVE TO TELL YOU ABOUT AN AMAZING SANDWICH I MAKE. It’s turkey-ham, muenster cheese, mustard, and peppered avocado paste (mashed up avocado with black pepper and a pinch of salt) on toast. It’s the greatest thing I’ve ever made. In my list of My Best Creations, this sandwich ranks right up there with my kids.

copperbadge:

meariver:

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dorkilybeautiful:

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Okay Anon that does sound like an awesome sandwich, and I’m gonna try making that avocado paste thing. 

But I gotta ask…when you say “turkey-ham”, do you mean turkey and ham (entirely acceptable) or some kind of meat like turkey bacon only it’s ham made from turkey? 

I mean the later would still be acceptable but I would also be a little afraid of it. 

I’m not anon, but I just ran down to the garage to take a photo because it exists.

It exists in our freezer.

I’ve never had it – it’s for the Roommate Who Can’t Eat Beef and Pork™ – but from what I can tell, it is indeed a ham made of turkey.

I’m trying not to be weird about this, because I’m sure this is great for people who can’t eat pork and I don’t want to make anyone feel bad for eating this! I’m sure it’s fine! 

But I just.

I’m afraid, dude. I’m afraid. 

I work in a deli. Turkey-ham is turkey mixed with ham. So it’s always at least somewhat processed. I’ve never had it, but the fancy brand we carry makes it, and their stuff is usually good. Also it doesn’t smell weird or anything. I’m picky about food but I’d eat it.

Not everyone gets it, but the people who like it REALLY like it and are sad because we almost never get it in and we barely get any when we do.

I never heard of it before I started working there, so that was a trip and a half.

EDIT: okay thsat was my understanding of turkery-ham but then I realized “wait that one person can’t eat pork” so now I’m really confused. maybe there’s different types of turkey-ham???? or did my coworkers fucking lie to me?

So what you’re telling me is that there are potentially multiple kinds of Turkey Ham?

This, my own private horror story, grows ever more harrowing.